Delivering baby Cosset

In the A+E department, a Filipino nurse came to me confused, saying that a patient presented with abdominal discomfort because of a "Cosset", which she did not understand.
It turned out that the patient had inserted a rather large courgette into his anus, and it had developed a sort of stalk distocia halfway up his rectum. I tried desperately to deliver the said vegetable, virtually fisting him in the process, but was quite perturbed that the practice was not entirely unfamiliar to him. I failed to deliver it manually, despite my encouragement to "push, I can see the stalk" ,so decided to inform my surgical colleague, who was from South India.

"A cosset?" he replied.
"a bit like a cucumber but bigger", I informed him.

" Oh, vy don't you say cucumber den?"
I decided not to answer, deciding that it would be better to discover his error by personal experience. Once he had removed the green behemoth utilising various tricks and tweaks with the silverware (in department), he proudly carried it around swaddled in blue paper, declaring to all and sundry :"is there anyone who'd like a salad?